Monday, June 16, 2008

A Day At The Range

Hope everyone had a lovely Father's Day!

I spent the morning amidst many a father and son at a local gun club.

Yes, I said gun club.

I know, sounds weird coming from me, the arts and crafts chick. However, I found out a few weeks ago that this year's cube farm retreat will include skeet shooting as an activity. Upon hearing this plan, I thought GREAT. Not only do I know little to nothing about shooting skeet or trap, but I have NEVER, in my 39 years on the planet, handled a firearm unless of course water guns count, which they don't. So yeah, guns? Not so much.

When I told my husband about this retreat activity he smiled and told me not to worry, he'd take care of it. I had no idea what that meant, but I trusted him. Days later he called me at work to let me know that we had an appointment at a local gun club with an instructor in a few weeks. A bit apprehensive, I agreed.

My husband was so looking forward to taking me shooting. He was the youngest child raised in a house full of brothers fathered by an imposing man who was a career Los Angeles County Sheriff Homicide Detective. My husband's entire family played team sports, ate copious amounts of beef and they all learned how to handle guns. You know, they're dudes. I, conversely, was raised by two over-educated pacifist hippies. When I was a child, my family avoided eating red meat or refined sugar, I was only allowed to watch one hour of network television per day and my Dad would conduct group therapy sessions with my friends in order to promote healthy teenage dialog. Yeah, our childhood experiences differ just a tad.

Gun-free childhood notwithstanding, I was going to have to learn to pull a trigger. Better to tackle this unknown with the trusted hubs than with the cube farm gang.

So, yesterday morning hubby and I headed north to the gun club to meet my instructor, Warren, who turned out to be a very patient and sweet man. He spent an inordinate amount of time teaching me about gun safety, proper form and how the game of trap is played. Upon completion of the fundamentals, Warren, asked me to put my earplugs in and pick up the shotgun from the rack. I apprehensively complied, extricated the weapon from the rack and walked cautiously to my first position. Warren dropped a round of ammo into my gun and I armed the weapon. He told me to say pull when I was ready, which I did just above a whisper. I pulled the trigger upon sight of the clay pigeon ejecting from the house, feeling the heel of the gun kick back into the crook of my shoulder as I fired. Okay, I missed, but I fired the weapon. No small feat for me!

Warren congratulated me and asked me if I was ready to try it again. I said yes and missed again. On my third attempt I hit the moving target! I was so excited! It was probably a fluke, but who cares! I blew that neon green clay pigeon to smithereens! Warren and my husband were cheering me on.


I hit another pigeon! And I pretty much continued to hit three to five targets in a row before missing one in between!

Warren looked at me and told me I was doing fantastic and the hubs was giving me a standing ovation from his observation bench! What an awesome feeling! Here I was at a freakin' gun club, the only chick for miles, hitting those clay pigeons one after the other like I'd been practicing my whole life, while the groups of dudes stationed on either side of us were hitting targets every now and again. How great is that???

Needless to say, I will be taking more lessons. My goal is to outshoot all the dudes at the retreat. I mean, they're scared of me now and I'm just your average crocheter/knitter. Just wait until they see me with a shotgun!

Moi? Competitive? Nah!


c-mama said...

:) Good for you. I'm a gun-shootin' crafter. I do have fun when I can get to the range.

The Shrone said...

Do you think your experiences will inspire a new line of crochet/knit items, like gun holster, clay pigeons, and various fashion accessories to wear while at the firing range?

Mal said...

Go Go gun Girlie!! I agree with the shrone - gun related crochet projects would ROCK!

I had a very similiar experience (although no group therapy sessions) in my younger years. Which stands out EVEN more because I lived in Texas.

I didn't learn how to handle or shoot a gun until I was in my late twenties when husband (then boyfriend) decided he wanted to try it out. I was not about to have any fire arms in the house without knowing how to use them so we went to classes, and guess what? I'm a better shot that he is!!

Sara said...

Note to self: don't piss off lady linoleum.

Have you ever see Eddie Izzard's schtick about clay pigeons? Apparently they are f*&^ers

Micky said...

Go girl!
Now I know you are making something in crochet for the occasion. Right?

Nichole D. said...

I remember my dad teaching us all the gun safety stuff, and making us shoot the rifles and shotguns. That's about as far as my knowledge goes, though. Good for you- I hope you kick those guys' butts!

Caroline B said...

Well done you! Let us know how the retreat goes - it's great to excel at something surprising to others!

Jenn with 2 enns said...

"... they're scared of me now.... Just wait until they see me with a shotgun!" BWHAHAHAHAHA! Excellent! I, with "the shrone" and others, look forward to what this inspires in your work.

FinnyKnits said...

Oh you're just plan rad now.

Skeet shooting IS fun! Love it.

I'll look forward to seeing your crocheted skeet shooting shawl in a future post.

Annika said...

Oh man, I totally want to do that!

woolanthropy said...

Needles, hooks, & a shot gun!
Watch out cube farm.

They have no idea of what is coming.

Kimberly said...

Go you! My Dad was taught me how to shoot your basic BB gun (Mum would not let him have anything else in the house) and I still remember the day that I finally outshot him against the basic cup on a tree branch....he says he hit it, but I made the coffee fly

Shell said...

I'm almost there, I have my FAC (Firearms Acquisition Certificate -which is mandatory in Canada for owning a firearm) and I know how to reload my own rifle rounds. Now I just need to go to the range to practice. I guess you could always make a gun cozy or a stuffed clay pigeon to commemorate the event.

Jennifer said...

When I was about 11 I shot out all the Christmas lights on the block with a neighbor kids BB gun. It was totally addicting, hitting those little targets. A little Annie Oakley. My horrified parents promptly banned me from touching another firearm, and I had to use my Christmas money to replace all the lights I shot out.

I might enjoy it too much if I went to the Gun Club.

Insert evil laugh here.......

Meg said...

Girl Power!