Monday, March 27, 2006

Contest Winners and Other Headlines

There were 49 ballots submitted! That's pretty darn cool for many reasons. Not the least of which is the fact that I was taken out of the decision-making process...Wooo Hooo!

Anyway, onto the show...

Drumroll please...

...Spaceship award goes to none other than The Shrone!

...Essay award goes to
Cheryl from OUT OF THE BOX.....A Credit to my Haircolor!

Congratulations to the two new proud alien moms!

Thanks to all of the contest entrants! What an amazingly creative bunch! And can I say again how lucky I consider myself for not having to pick winners from this group? Anyway, I will be sending each of you fabuloso entrants a little thank you giftie for playing.

Everyone who entered, please email me your mailing addy when you get a chance. Cheryl and Lori, please send me alien color preference as well: pastel or blue.

Headlines from LabLinoleum

Number One Headline - Happy Blogiversary to me! Oh yes, one year ago March 31st, I decided to take the cyber plunge and foist the Vegetable Liberation Army and their kind onto the world wide webby stage. All I can say is, so far, so good. I love being a part of your 'puter filled lives, basking in the cumulative glow of your creative exploits, reading your rants and raves, dialoging from all parts of the globe. It just doesn't get much better than this! You all rock!

Number Two Headline - HUGE thank you's to everyone who left a comment about the Mixed Grill Wrap! I am overwhelmed and stunned by your commentation (yes, this is a word, ask Drew...) and continued support. I know that I said this above, but you guys rock my world!

Number Three Headline - Finally, I will be gone for a week. Oh, yes, I am taking a much needed vacation as the Cube Farm has been workin' my gray matter right down to its squishy center. Quite simply, I am spent. So, where does an overworked Cube Farm inhabitant with a penchant for hook, stick and yarnage go for a bit of rejuvenation? Two hints...There is wool and Guinness involved. Yep, I'm going to Ireland! In fact, I leave for the airport in a couple of hours! So, what the heck am I doing still sitting here at the 'puter??? I don't know! Signing off now...

Contest prizes will be sent out upon my return. Tales from Ireland are sure to come! Have a wonderful week everyone!

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Mixed Grill Wrap

Who said a steak is only good for wearin' when beaten and bruised???

Well, I'm here to tell you that steaks (and other carnivorous delights) are fit for wearin' whenever you git yer kebab on! Okay, I don't really know what that means either...Whateva...

Introducing the Mixed Grill Wrap!

Modeled by my creative cohort (and fellow cube farm cell matey), Briana! And doesn't she look lovely swathed in grills, hot coals and burning flesh? Okay, said accoutrements are all made from yarn, but you get my point...

This is Monster Crochet Haute Couture I tell ya! Yes, it, is. Directly from my new Spring Line (yes, I do have a Spring Line, you're looking at it), this wrap is HOT. Pun before bun definitely intended.

Now, take a looksee at what's cookin'...



Cheeseburgers and franks!

All happily charring over hot coals of Rio de Plata...

I mean, does it get any better than this? Methinks not.

Crochet Stats-O-Rama

Yarns: Hot Coals - Rio De Plata; Everything Else - Cascade 220
Hook: H
Pattern: That's a given...

Oh yes there's so much more ahead here at Project Wrongway...Stay tuned!

Copyright 2006 Regina Rioux Gonzalez. All rights reserved.

Sunday, March 19, 2006


...In the Number One Monster Crochet Blogiversary Contest!

Awesome entries....

You are all free to gush over my webpage building speed and prowess with regard to this alien endeavor (pretty please???). Unfortunately, I've still not finished the freakin' Tomato gallery, but I will SOON! I promise!!!

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Shawl Meditations

It may come as no surprise to you peeps, but your hostess with the mostess, Lady of the Linoleum is not quiet of mind nor of spirit. My cerebrum plays host to an almost daily raging and raucous par-tay where wine flows freely from the tap on the box (just kiddin’…kinda) and ideas shake their groove thangs until the wee hours of the morn. Needless to say these obnoxious idea partiers oftentimes keep me from sleep and definitely provide me with a healthy dose of sensory overload much of the time. Seriously, psychotropic drugs are not needed here, thank you very much. Timothy Francis Leary, move ova! This is your brain. This is your brain on LadyLinoleum. Ahem, I digress…

Various attempts to quell the screams of the par-tay goers and quiet my mind via traditional meditative practices basically result in me not speaking, sitting on a pillow, legs crossed, staring off into space and thinking about vegetables with beards, or how to make a crocheted spaceship give off an electrical glow, or even wonder whether two mermaid bodies chopped off at the waist, torsos discarded, then pushed back together at the waist would make a good shawl…um, yeah. However, all is not lost because recently I found a meditation that seems to work for moi, effectively shutting down the idea ravers continual confabulations, gray matter staid, psyche soothed.

What is my meditative masque inquiring minds want to know? Makin’ shawls. Yes, you heard me correctly. Making shawls is akin to a trip to a day spa for my mind. I like to knit ‘em and crochet ‘em. The more complex the pattern the better, whether it be my own or someone else’s. Making shawls is immersion therapy for my addled mind. And folks, I am hooked. Can you tell? Totally strung out on these fantastic fibrous wonders, happily channeling my Inner Granny.

First, I made this lovely bat-wing inspired little diddy using a free pattern from Elann (pic from Elann's site).

Mine is a stashbuster made from four hanks of black Cascade 220 (legacy from a paranoid purchase that consisted of double digit amounts of black Cascade 220, hey, you just never know about store supply levels and I need to have black wool yer judgments...I've seen your stashes posted on yer blogs). At any rate it's a lovely and warm retro goth kind of item, imho.

Next up was a crocheted wrap which I will unveil in another post. It is a vintage Monster Crochet design which is sure to delight. Stay tuned for that one!

After completing those two projects I was in need of more shawl eye candy to tempt my needles to clicking so I purchased this book, which I LOVE and HIGHLY RECOMMEND if you find yourself in need of some knitted wrappage and want gorgeous patterns that levitate above and beyond the norm.

My future shawl making efforts will also lead me to explore this pattern and this one as well as a few that I plan to design myself.

So here I sit, completely content, quietly contemplating but not frantically cogitating, working hook and needle through the loops, breathing rhythmic, the world is good.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Alien Contest - Extended Deadline!

Extended Deadline - All Entries Due Friday (3/17)...

Unbelievable as it may seem, I will have been blogging for a year come March 31st. When I embarked upon this journey by setting up shop with this here little ole green bloggy, I'd no idea that anyone would (i) read my musings and look at my nutty crocheted creations, and/or (ii) enjoy them for that matter! I also had absolutely no idea that blogging would be such an effective vehicle for which to meet other crafty cohorts, who have, in short, changed my life. Yes, that means you! All of you. And yes, though I have a flare for the dramatic, I am not employing this skill at the moment. I mean it. You guys are awesome! Totally supportive, always have the ability to make me laugh and you inspire me with your incredible creative endeavors and zest for making. Crafty bloggers are the best!

So, in order to celebrate my Blogiversary in a style befitting Monster Crochet and at the same time pay homage to all those that actually read and interact with my little corner of the asylum, I think a contest is in order.

C'mon it'll be good. I promise!

First and foremost let talk PRIZES!

If you play, you have a chance to win a five foot tall blue crocheted alien!

Or a five foot tall pastel crocheted alien!

Okay, these alien dudes (or dudettes, winner may determine sex) are HUGE and their necks are a bit floppy, but hey, they'd look great reclining on your bed or sofa! And if you are lucky enough to win the right of alien companionship, you will own a very limited edition Monster Crochet creature as I only made two of these and you're looking at 'em!

You know you want an alien....I know you want an alien...Reach for the stars (pun intended) and seize the need for a little extraterrestrial action!

Two ways to play!

1. Write a story as to how these aliens ended up in your home.


2. Create an alien spacecraft (your choice of materials, must be three-dimensional).

Submit your entries to me via email as follows:

Title email: Monster Crochet Contest - [Spacecraft or Essay]

Body of email should include:

1. your name and blog/website name and address (if you own one).

2. Either essay text OR name and pic of spacecraft along with any relevant spacecraft information (i.e., mediums, processes, miscellaneous stats). If submitting spacecraft please make sure that picture resolution does not to exceed 96 dpi/300 x 300 pixels.

* Ship does not have to be to scale! But if you feel you need to create a ship large enough to fill your entire living room, who am I to say no...*

3. Please let me know if you would allow me to post your entry on my website as I would like to show off your creative endeavors!

You may submit one entry per category. However, each contestant may enter both the essay and spacecraft categories simultaneously (max 2 entries per person).

All contest entries must be received by March 15, 2006.

Voting will be open to the public.

Winners will be announced on March 25, 2006.

Have fun!

Any lingering questions? Email me.

Monday, March 13, 2006

Hurley Mato

All Hurley wanted was a little R&R. He was fed up. Tomato Fight Night Club ("TFNC") was testing his last little stem. Originally, Hurley joined TFNC in order to give his impoverished self-esteem a boost. Unfortunately most of the Tomatoes in TFNC were a couple seeds short of a fully ripened fruit. Surely, Hurley has issues with anger, but he's FAR from crazy. In fact, Hurley is one tough Mato.

Horribly disfigured from birth, having emerged from the vine with two eyes, not one like the rest of his red brethren, but two, and a tuft of curly human-like locks, the young plump-ette was ostracized by seed and fully ripened Mato alike all of his life. In spite of this adversity Hurley ripened. He ripened with issues, but ripened nonetheless, and in the process of ripening with issues sought many avenues for which to calm his Inner-Mato chaos and anger. TFNC seemed the answer to his prayers upon first encounter. He could surely work out his aggressions and self-loathing, hopefully gaining a little respect, for a change, in the process! Unfortunately, Hurley didn't take into account that the other MatoMembers of TFNC might have more serious issues than his own.

Once again, Hurley's life is mired in trial and tribulation. He cannot even take a vacation without becoming one of only a few survivors of a downed airliner, hopelessly LOST on a island God only knows where! At least his fellow survivors haven't said anything derogatory about his pair of eyes...

Crochet Stats
Yarn: Good Ole Red Heart Super Saver
Hook: G
Pattern: Monster Crochet Psychotic Tomato Pattern

I still have a lot of He and She-Matoes to add to the gallery peeps! I am also making my way through all of my emails and comments, which keep me sane at the Cube Farm I can assure you. Thanks to all for being so kind and patient with me!

Copyright 2006 Regina Rioux Gonzalez. All rights reserved.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Princess Leah Leia O'Lantern

Unfortunately for the kids next door, Gordy and Geordy Gourd, Leah O'Lantern Princess Leia O'Lantern has watched Star Wars one too many times.

When Leah approached the Brothers Gourd about coming over to her patch to play Star Wars, neither Cucurbitaceae youngster envisioned becoming buns on the side of a wig! No, the boys were thinking wookies or storm troopers or something a bit more, um, interactive...With blasters! After all, boys will be boys, even ones of the squash variety. Face it, role playing donuts on a wig just isn't manly.
Humiliated but much the wiser, Gordy and Geordy Gourd now hide under the soil when they see Leah heading over to their patch to inquire if they're available for a play date...
Crochet Stats
Pattern: Monster Crochet O'Lantern Pattern (To be released eventually...)
Yarn: Koigu KPPPM (This is my new favorite fiber!)
Hook: C2
Miscellaneous: My daughter wants Gordy (dark green eyes) very badly. So much so that I had to hide the little gourd so that she wouldn't abscond with him before photographing!
Copyright 2006 Regina Rioux Gonzalez. All rights reserved.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

I'm a Whine-O

As many of you may or may not know, I toil away at what I affectionately refer to as "my day job" (aka The Cube Farm) for nine hours each Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday hoping to earn enough dollars to (i) pay my mortgage, (ii) put food on the table, (iii) keep clothes on the backs of my husband and child and (iv) buy more yarn. For the last five years I've done my daily duty and mostly escaped the current work-induced ailment that began plaguing me relentlessly very recently, Brain Fry.

Brain Fry is a terrible condition that results in an inability to think clearly due to nine hours of daily spreadsheet trauma. Until recently, my position at The Cube Farm had an ebb and a flow, Brain Fry setting in around the holidays and subsiding around the first of the year. Previous to this current constant and consistent Brain Fry and during my down time at The Farm, I was able to answer personal emails, blog a little and of course, read about what's happening out there in the blogosphere. Not. Any. More. Folks, I am literally buried. Buried under spreadsheets, projects, reams of paper for which some unsuspecting tree gave it's life in sacrifice to the Office God...Needless to say, I am just too exhausted after returning home from The Farm to even turn on the 'puter and catch up with you all. In short, my life sucks right now. I know, I'm being a Whine-O. Whateva. Whining is one way that I massage my bedraggled creative self.

Sometimes though, whining is just not enough to soothe this agitated chickadee. So how does one LadyLinoleum soothe her tortured and twisted soul upon emergence from the depths of her paper-lined crypt each day? Fluff up her flattened creativity? Rehydrate her cremated gray matter? She unearths all of her patterns and surrounds herself with needles and hooks. She drags out all of her crafty texts and attempts new processes for her brain is still capable of following directions, yet unable to jump-start the muse. LadyLinoleum may be running on empty, but she's still got a quarter of a tank left to get home so she keeps her fingers moving.

In short, the daily spreadsheet drama creates inhospitable conditions for the emergence of new Monster Crochet creatures, but conditions are suitable for knitted wardrobe expansion. In light of this situation, I bring you two FO's:

A pair of fabulous fingerless gloves courtesy of my size one dpns and a pattern from Holiday Knits...

And Bobbilicious...

...From which I reaffirmed that I have an aversion to chunky yarn. Yes peeps, I admit it. I cannot stand working with large fibers. The good news is this means more for you for I am a thread-head at the core of my being. And so it goes.

Okay, back to whimpering whine-O mode. Please peeps bear with me during this time of burial beneath paper. I am s-l-o-w-l-y making my way through the blogosphere to visit you all. I am attempting to answer emails whenever humanly possible. And I am fighting to get my work-life back into a routine so that this issue is NO MORE. Please hang with me...this is a rough patch and I will prevail to crochet creatures again!