Sunday, February 26, 2006

Tomatoes From The Edge

Oh yeah, the tomato images and stories are rolling in! The one up above was created by Tampa Doll from the 'Ville. He's hot, don't ya think? If I were a Mato, I'd wanna squish up against him. Ahem, this is supposed to be G-rated. Sorry!

Go here to take a look at the gallery so far. I still have to post the individual tales, but I think it's coming along quite well.

You guys are making some wonderful Matoes!

Please remember to email me with your tomato image and story if you'd like to be immortalized in the Monster Crochet Tomato Gallery!

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

What Issues?

Now, I'm not one to complain. Who am I kidding. I complain all the time! However, this time I feel that my vocal vexation is completely justified.

Exhibit A

A gift of very cool vintage knit mags from a phenomenal blog buddy, Jessica! Thank you girlie! Actually, I used to own that issue of Vogue Knitting which went MIA at the time I relocated abroad. So needless to say, I am very happy to have that particular issue in my possession again for one cannot have enough magical mohair patterns in one's collection, IMHO.

Exhibit B

Courtesy of the United States Postal Service, I give you the mailing apparatus...

Notice the haphazard plastic sheathing combined oh so delicately with THE OFFICIAL USPS TAPE? Yeah well, what you cannot see in the photograph is the carefully sliced top of the envelope from which some faboo federal employee extracted more than half of the envelope's contents. However, thankfully leaving me something, anything of my gift intact, said faboo federal employee then considerately wrapped up the diminished contents for a not so safe delivery to its final destination, my UPS Store mailbox.

Are you kidding me??? Well, LadyLinoleum, apparently not. Who knew that a vintage book of crocheted cacti among other very cool vintage pattern book gems would be such a hit with our local postal consortium? Yeah, so much of a blockbuster that there is no longer even a need to cover up blatant postal theft? Ooops, you mean you never received the package at all??? So sorry ma'am. Fill out this form and we'll forward it to the Postal Inspector for you right away... Naaahhh! Just take that crocheted cacti booklet and other vintage pattern book gems right outta there, seal that puppy back up and ship it on its way! That chick'll never notice...The plastic wrap is transparent right?

I wonder if the postal worker with a penchant for crocheted cacti is one and the same as the individual who is planning to open a DVD rental store down the street stocked entirely with MY myriad missing Netflix shipments? Oh yeah, it's that bad over here in the postal code by the sea...

Fortunately, this gift did arrive safe and unharmed from none other than The Crochet Dude!

And yes, I will proudly admit that I have worn this bee-you-ti-ful example of fantastic fiber so often that my co-workers are wondering if I actually own any other articles of clothing besides this wondrously wooly extravaganza. They're just jealous...

Finally, another thankful refugee from the Planet Mail Fraud...

A fabulous eBay find! Oh yeah, circus characters constructed entirely from granny squares! And made entirely from Aunt Lydia's rug yarn no less...

In the words of my friend Ellen, "Granny squares are the building blocks of fashion." Or a strange rug yarn three ring circus at any rate...

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Norman Batesmato

Ahhh yes, time for another Psychotic Tomato to join the Monster Crochet fold.

Meet Norman Batesmato!

Average small motel proprietor by day (proud owner of the Batesmato Motel). Green, psychotic, wig-donning, mother-channeling Tomato by night!

Norman is aware that he's got issues for he blacks out several hours per night several times a week. In an effort to seek answers to his conundrum, Norman has been to endless hours of psychotherapy, subjected himself to a battery of psychological tests and MRI's and even tried taking sleeping pills only to find himself again, awakened somewhere on the motel grounds, dirty, disheveled, wearing a wig that looks distinctly like the one his mother wore in her golden years while sporting an ax as a hairpin, confronted by yet another disappearance of one of the motel's guests. Very curious indeed.

Norman is determined to find others who suffer from a plight similar to his in the hopes that he can gain an understanding of his disturbing affliction. So far he's only been able to find one other Tomato interested in speaking with him and he has a meeting scheduled with this Tomato, Professor Rojo, at a local coffee shop on Tuesday...

Speaking of Professor Rojo...He is looking for new recruits and wants to open up Psychotic Tomato production to all! So, go here to print out your FREE Monster Crochet Psychotic Tomato Pattern and get started. Then, send me a pic of your Tomato Terrorist and a short description so that I can post all of the Terribly Twisted Tomato Recruits together on their own page. It'll be fun and I will link back to you so that you can take full credit for your Tough Tomato Creation!

Copyright 2006 Regina Rioux Gonzalez. All rights reserved.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Floored, Linoleum Floored

I am floored.

One of my SNB buds, Ellen of L.A. Is My Beat (FABULOUS blog that I highly recommend, btw), left me a voicemail last Saturday, which I didn't listen to until yesterday due to self-imposed hermit status (don't ask...long, sordid and ultimately LAME) about a certain someone's blog (yours truly) having been mentioned in the current issue of Vogue Knitting's Knit 1 magazine.

I almost dropped the phone. Are you kidding me???

Apparently not. And not only did author, Kim Piper Werker of Crochetme fame, mention moi, but she also mentioned Jessica's brainchild, Amigurumi-Along and Roxy Craft!

All I have to say to Kim is, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!

And if this news wasn't enough to send me into outer orbit, Linda Scharf of CrochetLab fame wrote a very interesting article for Supernaturale about the vibrancy of today's crochet where she also mentions moi, Amigurumi-Along and Camilla Engman among others. How cool is that???

I am stunned AND floored or stunned on the floor. Anyway, you get my drift.

Thanks to everyone who purchased the Jellyfish pattern! I am so excited! Next pattern will be a freebie and I hope to have it done this weekend. Wooo Hooo!

Stay tuned.

Monday, February 13, 2006

Jellyfish Pattern!

It's big! Blue! And hairy! Oh, and it's of the sea...Mohair Jellyfish!

Mohair Jelly is special. Why, you might ask? Mohair Jelly was my pattern-testing guinea pig, um, I mean Jellyfish. Yep, I've done it! Finally finished a freakin' pattern! I know, I know, I deserve heaps of ridicule for my pattern authoring sloth. Whateva.

Anyway, I'm offering this particular pattern for sale (because it was a HUGE pain in the tush to write up), but have no fear it's cheap. I'd buy it! Okay, okay, not a good example.

Just look at how perty....

C'mon you know you want to give your hook a spin on this baby, I mean Jelly. You may purchase the pattern here...Free surprise pattern thrown in to sweeten the deal!

Sunday, February 05, 2006


Okay, no comments about the flash induced red-eye and lack of eye makeup PLEASE!

So, I give you my first FO from the Vintage Hat CAL, thank you very much. This groovy Gloria Swansoneque turbo turban was easy as pie to crochet. Literally it was a 37" by 7" strip of stripe-age. I thought to myself while working this fuzzy puppy up, "Self, this is going to work up in no time, piece o' cake, um, err, pie!" Well, the crocheting part was simple...However, ask me how many times I wrapped this thing on my head before finally pinning it into place to sew. C'mon I dare ya...

Let's just say I stood in the mirror for at least an hour the first night I attempted the wrap-age that resulted in me looking like a drunken version of the genie in Disney's Aladdin. The second night of wrapdown resulted in the configuration you see above. I still have issues with it, but thankfully, my issues are not detectable to anyone I modeled this turbo turban for. So, I am hailing the project a success and moving onto the flower encrusted muff and headband. Yee haw!

I finished another wearable this weekend as well. Yep, that's two FO's for moi in addition to cleaning my home and hosting a birthday extravaganza for my offspring. Neener, neener, neeee-ner...

Tackled the Vogue Knitting cover sweater above substituting Rio de Plata handspun for the yarn-age the pattern called for. Come to think of it, I rarely use the yarn called for in any given pattern. This means I always, always swatch. Call it a substitution occupational hazard. At any rate here's my very colorful version of the VK beauty pictured above, shown below:

And here's the $13 button I attached to the back (yes, I spent $13 on ONE button and just look at how bee-you-ti-ful it 'tis...worth each and every of the 1300 pennies I shelled forth):

Not a bad weekend. Finished some fun items and had a wonderful birthday celebration for my lovely daughter. It doesn't get much better than that!

Oh and speaking of Lena's birthday, she wanted me to let you all know that she was so touched by your wonderful birthday wishes. She actually teared up (as did I) upon reading your lovely sentiments. As always, you guys are really wonderful. My deepest heartfelt thanks to each and every one of you! Smooches all around!

Friday, February 03, 2006

Happy Birthday Lena!

This Sunday we will celebrate 13 years of her life. Magdalena, or Lena as she is called, is as gorgeous as she is goofy, as comedic as she is compassionate, as wise as she is playful, a creative mind to be reckoned with.

This daughter of my soul has been my artful companion since her conception. Always by my side in body and spirit, Lena accompanied me to my studio as a grad student and later to my classes where I would teach the art of making, the pair of us day-trippin’ through the fields of squishy paint flowers touching the creative recesses of hearts and minds in our midst. Looking back, I now know that this child of mine was taking everything in. She inhaled every word, every image, every drop of paint, every particle of graphite, every pinch of clay, yes, every fiber of yarn, every shred of dialog, every moment infused with blossoming creativity as if myriad seeds planted directly into the core of her being. And the seeds took root. And sprouted stems and leaves and flowers and more seeds…Whether nurture or nature, though I’d hazard a guess that both play a part, Magdalena is the most amazing creative mind I’ve ever had the privilege to meet, and this is not just proud mom speak. Take a look at the art that this child creates:

Sculpey monster.

Purplish bag of her own design.

Yes, it is lined.

Green clutch of her own design.

Also lined.

Above she sports a scarf and headband of her own design.

My beloved Lena is astounding to me. She is unceasingly inspirational. Her lovely smile, sweet laughter and abundance of creative energy are a daily reminder of my purpose on the planet.

Happy Birthday Magdalena Rae! I love you from the deepest recesses of my soul to the tips of my fingers and toes!