Wednesday, February 22, 2006

What Issues?

Now, I'm not one to complain. Who am I kidding. I complain all the time! However, this time I feel that my vocal vexation is completely justified.

Exhibit A

A gift of very cool vintage knit mags from a phenomenal blog buddy, Jessica! Thank you girlie! Actually, I used to own that issue of Vogue Knitting which went MIA at the time I relocated abroad. So needless to say, I am very happy to have that particular issue in my possession again for one cannot have enough magical mohair patterns in one's collection, IMHO.



Exhibit B

Courtesy of the United States Postal Service, I give you the mailing apparatus...



Notice the haphazard plastic sheathing combined oh so delicately with THE OFFICIAL USPS TAPE? Yeah well, what you cannot see in the photograph is the carefully sliced top of the envelope from which some faboo federal employee extracted more than half of the envelope's contents. However, thankfully leaving me something, anything of my gift intact, said faboo federal employee then considerately wrapped up the diminished contents for a not so safe delivery to its final destination, my UPS Store mailbox.

Are you kidding me??? Well, LadyLinoleum, apparently not. Who knew that a vintage book of crocheted cacti among other very cool vintage pattern book gems would be such a hit with our local postal consortium? Yeah, so much of a blockbuster that there is no longer even a need to cover up blatant postal theft? Ooops, you mean you never received the package at all??? So sorry ma'am. Fill out this form and we'll forward it to the Postal Inspector for you right away... Naaahhh! Just take that crocheted cacti booklet and other vintage pattern book gems right outta there, seal that puppy back up and ship it on its way! That chick'll never notice...The plastic wrap is transparent right?

I wonder if the postal worker with a penchant for crocheted cacti is one and the same as the individual who is planning to open a DVD rental store down the street stocked entirely with MY myriad missing Netflix shipments? Oh yeah, it's that bad over here in the postal code by the sea...

Fortunately, this gift did arrive safe and unharmed from none other than The Crochet Dude!



And yes, I will proudly admit that I have worn this bee-you-ti-ful example of fantastic fiber so often that my co-workers are wondering if I actually own any other articles of clothing besides this wondrously wooly extravaganza. They're just jealous...

Finally, another thankful refugee from the Planet Mail Fraud...



A fabulous eBay find! Oh yeah, circus characters constructed entirely from granny squares! And made entirely from Aunt Lydia's rug yarn no less...

In the words of my friend Ellen, "Granny squares are the building blocks of fashion." Or a strange rug yarn three ring circus at any rate...

21 comments:

angharad said...

Holy cow, do you get to keep the poncho? I have seriously been thinking (obsessing) about that very item ever since I saw it on his site. WOW-Lucky you! And koodos on the ebay find, I have my own ebay collection and have spent waaayyyy too much time looking, but I've never seen that one. Looks good!

:)

Vera said...

You got some cool stuff. Can a Linoleum Circus be in our future?

Kari said...

Love that poncho!!!!!!!! It rocks!

Your postal nightmares are the very reason we ONLY ship through UPS anymore.

Renee said...

The poncho made me gasp. I was like, "PoooonnchooooooOOOOHHHHOOOO"I'm sorry to hear about your postal difficulties, I used to have the same problem when my dad would ship me gifts from South Korea (he was living there at time) and a few things went missing and some were smashed beyond repair.

Rebecca-bakesale said...

Good for you posting the evidence of the post office's egrregious crime! I wish I had evidence. They just completely lot one of my pacakges with two bags.
Too bad I don't like UPS either!

FinnyKnits said...

Oh the woes of the postal service. The only consolation I have is that our USPS can not even hold a candle to the horrific tales I hear from my Roman friend about the Italian post office. My god they ate her friggen Godiva chocolates right out of the box and only left her one cream with a bite out of it forpetessake! And forget re-wrapping it. They just slapped a piece of tape over the gash in the envelope. Lordie.

Sweet poncho btw -- and I am looking forward to seeing your interpretation of a granny square circus act, please.

Heather said...

Love the poncho, those colors are fabulous!

Sue said...

Man, that's annoying. I've been victim of the postal 5-finger discount as well. So freakin' obvious as to when the theft occured. Bastards!
On a happier note...cool poncho! Totally funky!

Ellen Bloom said...

Wow! You have some very generous friends! Love all those books, magazines, etc. Drew's poncho is so YOU!! Are you modeling it tonight at the WeHo SnB? Save me a seat!

Allena said...

oh i love the gifts... sorry about the MIA stuff though.. that's not good.
I love the circus fun fun can't wait to see what you make

~drew emborsky~ said...

I'm glad you like the poncho. Now let's see a pic with you a wearin' it!! ;)

MonkeyGurrrrrl said...

Dude. You must be from my 'hood. Both the 90035 and the 90019 have that kind of postal "service". Don't even get me started.

Purty poncho. You must be someone very special to have received that!

Rose said...

Geez, I hope your postal service doesn't decide to move north! Cool stuff, though.

Kimberly said...

*shudder* lets NOT mention the postal service around me! *grin*

Luhv da poncho!

Tara said...

I would be LIVID about the mail stealing. Isn't that supposed to be a federal offense in the US?
I love the circus guys.

miss kendra said...

circus!

i want the trapeze lady to look like me.

Gina said...

Wow, what a score at ebay!

samantha said...

Evil bad post office!

Lovely wonderful gifts!

Rebecca said...

oh the postal people! how do they sleep at night?!? i currently have a pkg that SHOULD be in the hands of ms.threeolive - but where oh where is it???
speaking of the PO, you should be getting a puffy from me any time (should be)

i'm very anxious to see what comes of the circus book....

Pandora said...

Whoa, yeah, it is actually a FEDERAL offense to open mail intended for someone else! How terrible! I am glad for your gifts that got through, though. I will take the warning to heart and probably send my gifts UPS in the future.

stuffed said...

I know two wonderfully moral, and yet still delightful, people who work for the USPS. Now, I'm not saying that they are the only moral people in the USPS but I do wish that they worked at MY post office. :)

Cool mail call.