Tuesday, April 17, 2007

I Wanna Be "B"

I am often asked how I am able to design and complete such a large number of projects on a weekly, monthly, yearly basis while simultaneously gainfully employed (40+ hours a week) on a management team of a major investment banking practice and playing the role of wife and mother to boot. Well my friends, I am your classic example of a Type A personality, a state of being in which I used to take much pride. Really, until about six months ago, I considered myself to be a bit like Wonder Woman…uh, without the satin one-piece. Red boots and cape…check.

Really though, I thought I could achieve anything (cube farm promotions, future design empire…seriously what can I NOT do?), endure everything (deaths, husband out of work…pish posh), with time to spare and money in my pocket. Yep, I think the term “deluded” fits my past perceptions of self quite nicely, thank you very much. What was the Windex on the rag that wiped my lens-turned-inward clean for the first time, well, ever?

A trip to the doctor. A trip to the doctor which indicated that my blood pressure is high. I mean, dangerously high.

Needless to say my high horse was immediately cut down to size. Um yeah, like pony-size.

How could I have high blood pressure? I’m only 37 years old. I eat a relatively healthy diet. Okay, for the last few years I haven’t exercised at all. Hey, I’ve been crocheting and knitting and blogging, what can I say? Did I mention that I am Linda Carter incarnate? I’ve got the boots and cape to prove it.

Apparently, these arguments did nothing to sway the cuff, nor my doctor’s mind. I have high blood pressure and according to both, I need to make aggressive life style changes combined with medication to get my hypertension under control.

I just don’t remember watching Linda Carter down her daily BP meds at the beginning of every Wonder Woman episode. This sucks.

After a plethora of imaginary angina attacks (really though, they seemed real at the time) and a lot (read: overkill) of feeling sorry for myself, I got on a regimen of meds, kicked meat (not the crocheted kind, don’t you worry your pretty little heads) in favor of a vegetarian diet with sodium at a low and yes, I hired a personal trainer (I know, totally bourgeois…whatever) in an attempt to remake my life and my priorities while simultaneously regaining my cardiac health. An early exit just isn’t in the cards for me peeps. I’ve got too much to crochet and knit after all. Not to mention the fact that I have a daughter, husband, mother and siblings who need me.

At any rate, the training sessions began last night and one of the primary reasons I hired my particular personal trainer dude, is that in addition to teaching everything martial arts he says he’ll also teach me to relax my mind as well as my body with a discipline (yes, that's a Type A word...give me a break) of yoga, tai chi and guided meditation.

Relaxation? What the hell is that?

Believe you me, relaxation is a foreign concept to me. I am a little high-strung after all and learning how to ignore time, take it easy and just breathe, for goodness sake, is really difficult for me! However, I’m willing to give it a try. If I want to be around for the long haul, I have to make the effort.

So, dear readers, let me now ask for your patience and understanding. In an effort to slow myself down a bit I may not leave a comment on your blog for a while. Doesn’t mean I’m not visiting. If you’ve sent me an email and you haven’t received a response from me, just send me a little virtual nudge. I am slower than molasses with regard to writing up my patterns…have no fear, this shouldn’t get any slower. I don’t know that all of this required relaxation will stunt my creative process and turn my blog to blah-g, but I’m hoping it won’t. Is that even possible? I don’t know.

Can I just go back to Type A mode for a sec?

Okay. Life changes are a bitch!

Back to happy healthy mode.

*Comforting, soothing music begins to play.*

I’m a little scared, a lot motivated and my vision is becoming clear…there’s definitely something to be said for coming in second place.

28 comments:

Michelle said...

Good luck in your inner zen.

Kari said...

*hugs*
You'll do fine... this is all a part of that cursed aging thing or so they tell me.

Wendy said...

I am type A, also. Good luck with the lifestyle change. I admit I keep trying to do it and will be good for a few months and then slip back into old habits. You are smart to have someone like a trainer to help hold you accountable.

miss kendra said...

you'll always be number 1 to me.

:)

and you know i'm an A too!

Tifffany said...

Good luck with your big changes! I'm sure you'll do great at it!

Deneen said...

My husband has had high BP since he was 20 years old-genetics babyyyyy. He did the diet, working out, special diets-still eats low salt, etc and it didn't budge the BP a bit and at 35, starting taking BP meds and has now for 6 years. It's still borderline high, but the doctor finally told him that it was futile-no dietary changes, no exercise changes (although it was better for him)could control it.

Try not to focus in on the high BP too much, makes it go higher. You have also been under a lot of emotional stress lately-more then the average person. Cut yourself a little slack. Positive thinking helps a lot-good luck with the yoga and the trainer, kinda neat to have someone monitoring you-I always did better when I went to classes versus doing things on my own (the whole competition thing-if she can do it, hell I can do it better and longer).

FinnyKnits said...

All us Type A's have to stick together and support one another. You take some time for P&Q before your head pops! Meanwhile, we'll all go on a NO red yarn (red meat, red yarn - you get it) diet and like it.

And good for you for getting your BP checked. Out of fear, I haven't had my cholesterol checked because I just *know* it's bad.

Jerry & Maxy said...

May the force of peace be with you...

Red Rocket said...

Except that the upside of being a type-A is that you're more likely to stick with the relaxation program, I'd think.

Best of luck with all the changes you're about to make. :)

lisa s said...

you are going to do great! just be well... that's what's most important!!

Rose said...

Take care, toots! If it makes you feel any better, I'm type B and I can't eat red meat, have to exercise every day and still have high blood pressure. Damn genes...

Selena K said...

Wow--take care of yourself, Lady! And what's all this second place mumbo jumbo? You're still the best crazy crocheter I know!

shula said...

LL, I've got one word for you.

Yoga.

susan said...

ah it is never easy to actually "Slow down." for ones as creative as you.
but your plan sounds like a good one and you have SO much at steak. er, stake.
your health is everything, so glad you are getting it all under control!
sending an ommmm or two over to you from the soggy coast.
hugs
susan

Corvus said...

All I can say is good luck.

christianne said...

good luck to you with the PT! it'll be fine, you'll be fine...

Madge said...

From one type A to another...I feel your pain. (Literally. I was diagnosed with hypertension last year; runs in the family.) Aging is a b*tch. But you will succeed! (Is there any doubt you will triumph? I don't think so.) And bonne chance.

Smoochies.

Cheesy Knit Wit said...

Good luck in slowing your pace down. I should probably do that also.

Julie said...

I'm a type Z personality (I listed sleep as a hobby on questionaires until I had a kid), 38, not overweight, and have high blood pressure. Welcome to the club. It's kind of surreal here.

Take yer meds, get some excercise, don't eat stuff that's full of fat, and try not to think about it too much. Stress makes it worse, yanno.

Hang in there.

Nancy said...

I was always more comfortable being second chair in band...more interesting parts and less stress.

relax and enjoy...

be well.

Obsidian Kitten said...

i'm a recovering type-A. it took me a couple of stays in the psych ward and the complete failure of my thyroid to get me to stop moving in high gear, though--eventually prompting our move from NYC (where pretty much everyone is in constant brownian type-A motion, i now realize) to our peaceful little farmette out here in the middle of nowhere. uh, i mean michigan. so it's 12 miles to the bookstore--that doesn't mean it's nowhere, right?

anyway, the nervous breakdown and the hashimoto's thyroiditis (does that sound like a great godzilla character or what? lol) are *not* prerequisites for leading a calmer, saner life.

good luck making the changes now--slowly, one day at a time, and without too much, uh, over-zealousness. easy does it, luv! (hehhehheh, far easier said than done for us over-achieverly super-hero types, but it does sound good, doesn't it?)

oh, and i'm only 38. *giggle* ...i would definitely have kept going at 98 rpms if the other stuff hadn't slowed me down.

(my BP is BiPolar...also a contributing factor. but whatever...we all gots something. good luck and i'll send fleecey farmy peacefulness you way!)

Sue said...

Yup, 36-37 is when it all started sliding south for me. I can relate. However, it sounds like you're on the right track, no need to worry. Best of luck with your new routine. Who knows, perhaps the improved health will allow you to be Super-Wonder Woman! Kind of like a Bionic Woman/Wonder Woman/Elastic-Girl combo.

briana said...

I'm so proud of you. This is a big step in the right direction and I want you in my life for a long, long time.

In other news and solidarity, I'm going back on WW to combat the 10 lbs I gained in New Mexico. Off to spinning!

xo,
me

Yarn Tails said...

High Blood Pressure I can honestly say I dont have. Its all the other crap of getting older that I have. Ugh! I wish you all the best! Please take care of yourself. We love your creative side! Well the other side too...lol Hope you are having a wonderful weekend!

Vorpal Knitter said...

At my last checkup my doc said it was possible I was getting high blood pressure, too. I've been kindof avoiding the subject but you've inspired me. I'll go back to the doc and get a more thorough exam. I can't avoid this like I have been.

Shell said...

Mmmm, martial arts trainer. Can I have one too? So long as you have crocheted bacon, life can't be too bad.

Sally said...

Dude, you are so preachin' to the choir here. I am 33 and have cholesterol levels at 250. And going up. Woo hoo! Doesn't it blow when life smacks you in the face like that? But I am glad you are making the changes necessary to stick around. Not only does your family need you - us bloggers need you too!! Where else can I go to get my Princess Leia-Buns fix??

Noreen Crone-Findlay said...

You struck a BIG chord with me on this one! As one of those: "Too much inspiration, too little time, oh who needs to sleep" types myself, I too, am slamming against the health wall.
Ah, yes... set those priorities!
Actually, your post just gave me the courage to say no to something that I had promised to do for someone. She's not gonna like it.... but it's going to save some sanity for me! THANKS! and big big hugs!
Noreen
@www.hankeringforyarn.com